


Drunk on Love

by PeroxidePrincess (heretherewillalwaysbedragons)



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: 2012, Blackmail, Crack, Drunk Antics, Drunk Making Out, Drunk Sex, Drunkenness, Established Patrick Stump/Pete Wentz, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm warning you, M/M, Soul Punk Era Patrick Stump, Stag Nights & Bachelor Parties, Why Did I Write This?, because andrew John hurley is evil and likes to watch his friends look like fools, drunk escapade, everyone's drunk except andy, idk anymore, just..., shitty humor, what even is this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-29 19:16:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15735711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heretherewillalwaysbedragons/pseuds/PeroxidePrincess
Summary: It's Joe's bachelor party, so of course everyone is invited, and everyone gets drunk.Except Andy, but he gets to blackmail everyone.ORPete gets handsy, Patrick is semi-sober until he sees Brendon's "ding-dong", Joe is comatose, Frerard shamelessly make out, and everyone else is just...being drunk.





	Drunk on Love

**Author's Note:**

> woo! second fic!  
> this is just... idk. I researched out how they all get drunk, and all I've found is that Patrick is a happy drunk and likes to dance.  
> ...I hope you enjoy..?

Andy didn't know why he'd signed up to be chaperone at Joe's bachelor party.

Because otherwise they'd all end up in one massive orgy, he thought, and agreed.

So now, he was sitting in the corner of some bar, a trusty camera recording everything for blackmail as everyone got piss-drunk.

As it was, Joe was already comatose (it was  _his_ bachelor party after all) on the floor, with multi-coloured dicks on his face, as well as a moustache and an 'I heart dick'. Patrick, still semi-sober, sat next to him and was benevolently trying to scrub some of the cruder drawings off his face while Pete got handsy with Patrick's general lower body. Then, the singer have up, slapped Pete's hands away, skillfully ignoring his fiancée's pout (bless him for at least trying to keep things PG) and picked himself up off the floor. He sent Andy an exasperated look before yelping and running away as Pete squeezed his ass.

Meanwhile, Gabe was yelling "SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS!", flashing with Travie's "CHUUUG!" as William drowned in alcohol.

Brendon was screeching "Paint me like one of your French girls, Way!" at Gerard (who was to busy making out (having hand sex) with Frank) while stripping on the table. Patrick (easily recognisable as he was the shortest person in the room and his hair was bleached), recovering from Pete's assault, was trying valiantly to get him down screaming "NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR UGLY DICK BRENDON!" with such horror that even Frank and Gerard stopped humping each other for a few seconds before going right back to moaning in each other's months.

Joe, of course, chose the right time to (temporarily) wake up, and  _of fucking course_ the first thing he had to see was Brendon, which resulted in a piercing shriek of "GET THAT DING DONG OUTTA HERE!" before catching sight of Frerard and adding: "AND THE OTHER DING DONG TOO!" before going right the fuck back to sleep.

Ryan was pretty much salivating into his beer as he watched Brendon and Mikey and Ray were just... staring at each other while Spencer was subjected to whatever form of torture a drunk Jon Walker brings. Josh had somehow gotten his hands on a spoon and was spoon-feeding Tyler tequila, and since they were both already wasted, ended up spilling everything.

Pete seemed to have gotten Patrick's disinterest in making out, and was moping with Bob at the bar, fiddling with the glittering ring on his hand, not even noticing when a thoroughly disgruntled Patrick flopped down next to him  and drank about ten shots consecutively before slumping on the suspiciously stained surface. Five minutes (two suspicious screams from the general direction of Frank and Gerard and a long soliloqui from Pete and Bob about being forever alone and forever rejected), the singer was thoroughly inebriated and lifted his head from the bar. Patrick waved at Andy, smiling widely (poor happy drunk), before catching sight of Pete and giggling as some drunk (and probably adorable) plan formed in his head. He leaned over, chair tilting and swaying precariously and attempted to kiss Pete on the cheek for the next 2 minutes, before falling off with a yelp and managing to smooch the bassist's left ear. 

Pete didn't miss a beat, caught the singer, before both of them collapsed on the floor and started making out, resulting in an obscenely loud moan from Patrick (for such a little guy, he had some serious lung power) and a disgusted sigh of misery from Bob.

Andy just smiled and patted the little camera next to him.

Patrick's horrendously bad-tempered hangovers or not, this was perfect blackmail.


End file.
